Wednesday, June 8, 2011

Booger Redirector

On Sunday, I was sitting in the choir loft, same as usual.  I happened to catch a view - a good, clear visage - of the little acolyte boy, who was about nine or ten years old.  Cute kid.

Who apparently has a cold.

I watched him sniff a bunch, and attempt to wipe his nose with his hand.  And then scratch his nose.  And then pick it.  And then LICK HIS FINGERS.

And then the whole scene played out again.  And again.

My stomach was rolling, but it was communion, so I knew I was going to have to "eat" in front of people and deal somehow with my disgust. 

(as an aside, I had a bandaid on my thumb and only barely managed to not dip my bandaid in the communal chalice of "blood of Christ," only because this happened below the lip of the goblet or whatever you call it, I am pretty sure that the congregation thought I full-on submerged my nasty band aid into the grape juice.  how nasty is that??)

Anyway, so when it was time to go down for communion, I reached over and grabbed a few kleenex from a box in the choir loft.  The choir walked down to the front rail, and I watched the lady standing in front of me surreptitiously hand the acolyte boy a few tissues.  And then I started laughing, and did the same.  Only less surreptitiously, because, what the heck.  Kid, you are at least nine years old, you ought to know better.

My church was kind of gross this week.

According to this source, that kid wasn't the first to be caught green-fingered...

No comments:

Post a Comment